Valentine's Day for Classic MAZ

My earliest memory of Valentine's Day is maybe around 2nd grade. I remember spreading out all the cards in front of me and spending way too much worry and time trying to figure out which classmate got which card.

There were several kids in my class that I did not want to give a Valentine.
(sing song whiny voice)

"BUT WE HAVE TO GIVE TO EVERYONE SO NOBODY IS LEFT OUT"

Really? Well maybe if we could leave out the booger picker or the bully....they might get the hint that they aren't loveable!

I would have given those kids something like the above Valentine...meaning "i got my eye on you" because you are weird and I don't want a booger flicked on me!

I also remember asking for and getting the Conversation Heart Candy every year. I remember squeezing my eyes shut and asking the sugar heart gods "does (insert that week's boy crush) like me?"
I reach in and pull out the heart that would tell me the future, tell me the truth.


"not likely"

Look for a new boy to like!


When I was in Junior High
(we did not call it middle school and it was 7th - 9th grade...the way it should be!)
They sold carnations to raise money for.....
something...
anyway, On Valentine's Day, if you got a white one: friends!
If you got a yellow one: secret admirer!
If you got a pink one: like!
If you got a red one: love!

AND HECK..we were what...13...so it had to be the real thing!

I never got one.

AND I am highly suspicious that the girls that got handfuls...bought them for themselves.
I have since taught teen boys and have two of my own.
There are very few boys that are going to be willing to buy a flower and give it for all to know...to a girl they like, or are interested in liking!


I have never cared for flowers and chocolate or jewelry.

I knew I would find the perfect guy when I received a Valentine that held my "everlasting love"..

MCDONALD'S BUGERS!!!

Or Jeff!!

 I love him as much as a Quarter Pounder meal!!

AND THAT IS A LOT OF LOVE!!!!

I know what I see..what do you see?

When I walk into or out of a room, life goes into slow motion, a wind blows through my hair, and life is drowned out by the loud awesome theme music that follows me....mostly White Stripes music.

You all know what I am talking about..you have seen it on movies...when the tough guy is about to head into a fight..

I am so awesome, I experience this every day. My face is set in a "don't mess with me" expression and I glide in and out of my life's scenes.

AT LEAST I THOUGHT THAT IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE!

This past week has left me so tired that my grandiose vision was impaired.

I DID NOT move slow, graceful, and impressive down the hall.

I shockingly caught myself waddling from side to side, slumped in exhaustion, with my eyes ready to close in sleep and I heard the "quacking" squeeks of my shoes.

I don't know how you people live in your world. I can't wait until I am back to commanding the room like Uma Thurman...and Daft Punk plays for all to hear.

You don't follow me on facebook? Then you have missed some adventure!

I almost didn't write this post because I have been updating on facebook...

BUT then I remembered my readers that DO NOT read facebook...

Two weeks ago (on Friday) Jack was given Septra for an ingrown toenail. It is an antibiotic of the Sulfa drugs.

For a whole week (while he took and finished the 7 day Septra) Jack had 104 fever, non-stop vomiting and developed a rash. The doctor said it was a "flu-like" virus.

Saturday ( a week later) I took Jack to the doctor office but saw a different doctor (the one we like). He took one look at Jack and sent us straight to LeBonheur Children's Hospital ER.

The ER triage nurse knew immediately that he was having a severe drug reaction.

The ER doctor said "this is not good".  He admitted Jack and we stayed two nights.

The rash was "like a burn".  Jack was burning from the inside out and he FELT IT!!!

 

He held the popsicle in his mouth "to cool off"!

click on the pics for a better view 

He reminded me of one of my favorite children's book....Put Me In The Zoo

 I actually felt like I was in a zoo in Jack's room! They have a viewing window. I thought about running up to the glass and hitting it like the zoo apes....

The way the closed curtain was positioned (while sleeping at night) I could STILL see the window, the nurses....and they could see me....creepy!

The Septra damaged Jack's liver. His liver enzymes should be 25 to 50. They started at 1430 and went down to 990. It will take awhile to recover but we are thankful the damage is not permanent!

Because of the damage, the liver did not process the tylenol that was given to him to lower his fever.

His blood count was a 1.7 (I think it is supposed to be 5?).

His sodium was really low and they were monitoring his skin. There was a possibility that it would sloth off (like a burn). Thankfully it did not!

Jack was also extremely dehydrated. He had an IV for 2 days......a lot of bags!

The doctors did a bunch of tests to monitor and check for other issues.

When we went to have an ultrasound, the transporter parked Jack (and his wheelchair) under this piece of art:

A Jackass and the definition! HILARIOUS for a children's hospital...and perfect for Jack!

(click on the pic and look close!)

We had many friends and family come visit us in the hospital! We have received loving cards, and yummy meals!

We have been told that this was VERY SERIOUS and Jack's body took a hard hit! We are thankful that things were not worse!

I knew Jack would be fine when the hospital advocate gave him this get well card. After the man left, Jack slowly picked up the card, came out of his "zombie state", and said

"he did not put money in the flap"

I want to thank everyone for their thoughts, prayers, love and help! We are rich and happy!

Jack goes February 10th to see a Hepatologist. I call her the Liver Lady. She will care for Jack and his liver!

He is to drink plenty of water!

and no medications for awhile! Mr. Liver needs a rest!

It is oozing everywhere

Jack oozes sarcasm 24 hours a day!

Here are samples of what I HAVE to read...every....day....


Student: Jack
Journal: How can you improve your physical fitness and health?

My fingers are a little weak, so I will need to exercise them. To improve my fingers' and thumbs' physical fitness, I will need to play Minecraft, MW3, and BF3. When exercising with such extreme workouts, you must be careful not to pull a ligament in your fingers or thumbs. Also, be careful not to strain your thumb muscle. If it gets to be too much, then take a break. 
In order to improve my health, food wise, I need to eat more Taco Bell. Taco Bell has foods from the food pyramid. They have lettuce, tomato, onion, and potato for vegetables. They have ground beef, steak, chicken, and sometimes, shrimp for meats. For grains, they have chips, rice, and tortilla. In all, Taco Bell is good for you.


Student: Jack
Journal: Have you ever watched a plant grow?

No, I have not watched a plant grow. Would I like to watch a plant grow? Why yes, I would love to sit and stare at the ground for hours on end. I hope I can control my excitement while I wait for a tiny green thing to pop out of the ground. Sadly, I don't have the time. As soon as I have at least no plans for three days, I'll be outside, on a lawn chair, in my snuggie, waiting.


Student: Jack
Journal: What are the advantages and disadvantages to having a pet rock? (2 separate entries)

Having a pet rock has its advantages. Pet rocks are really inexpensive. Pet rocks know some really amazing tricks like holding their breath under water forever. Pet rocks also never die! Pet rocks have at least two babies every time you hit one with a hammer! Pet rocks don't make messes, poop, pee, eat, or drink. Pet rocks also come in many different kinds! Pet bolder rocks are good guard rocks. Pet gravel rocks are grumpy and rough, but fun to watch. Pet pebble rocks make good lap rocks and they love skipping across water. Pet rocks are wonderful pets!


I previously wrote about advantages to having a pet rock, but there are some disadvantages. A disadvantage to having a pet rock is you have to move them. Pet rocks don't have legs, fins, wings, or belly muscles. A disadvantage to having a pet bolder rock is that they are hard to move and they are not an indoors rock. Pet gravel rocks hurt when you sit on them or walk on them barefoot. Pet pebble rocks can be lost easy. They are also easy to swallow. One more thing, make sure your pet rock is domesticated. If your pet rock is not domesticated, it could prove deadly for you and your family.

I would love to share Jack's history paper on:
China
A person in the the Han Dynasty

It is a long, short story.
It contained the historical facts.
The main character was Chingchangchow Pow Dhindiggdy Shizzlemewizzle Shefuh Shane "but you can call me Shane".


I know exactly where Jack would spend most of his time in REAL school.
...in trouble

I will never go to Brazil for a swim!

Have you ever been swimming in a pool, lake or ocean and something touches you? It clings to your arm and you flail to get it off. You move in closer, careful not to touch it and then you realize it is a band aid or piece of skin.

Well, if I am in the ocean and this happens, I usually think it is a monster trying to kill me and I put on quite a show before I realize it is just seaweed.


When I experience this in pools, I create quite the tidal wave as I try to swoosh all the surrounding water out of the pool. My family ignores me but strangers start to worry.

This act makes me feel that the pool is clean again.

Now I have a NEW worry...

I was recently reading in the Smithsonian Magazine about WHY the killer whales migrate and then spend just a short time in the subtropic waters off Uruguay and Brazil.

They have gone to the "spa"(warm waters) for a skin peel...
....killer whales shed their skin!

GAH!!

That is some major dead skin floating around in the ocean!!

I had a daymare of swimming in the ocean and then all of a sudden, I am trapped in this cloudy substance. I panic.
WHAT IS GOING ON??

I would never be the same again!

I would HAVE to peel all of my skin off....for sure!

stop spreading your nasty!

If MAZ was in the crowd....

I have always been fascinated by Jesus, "the teacher".

History tells us that Jesus would teach for long periods of time.

Was ADD not a problem back then?

I have never been to or watched ANYTHING that would completely thrill or entertain me for as long as these people would sit and listen to Jesus talk.

When I study the scripture, I try to put myself in that time...

The Sermon On The Mount

Historians think that the sermon on the mount took place here.....beautiful!

This might be the very sight!

As a teacher and easily distracted person...

My mind would be wandering:

"how could I recreate that color of blue in a quilt?"

"should I sit in the grass where sheep could have possibly peed or on this rock where a scorpion or bigmongus spider could be living?"

"why did I have to pick this area to sit? I think these people missed last months bath!"

And my number one concern of every hour of the day...

"when do we eat?"

And the teaching!

....you can have more than a temporary or circumstantial feeling of happiness

WHAT? those fleeting and few moments of complete happiness that I have experienced can be forever? they can feel deeper and real?

HOW?

*those who recognize they are in need of God's help

*those who mourn their sin that led to spiritual, emotional, or financial loss

*those who do not assert themselves over others for their own personal agenda

*those who hunger and search for what is morally right, virtuous an justifiable

*those that show kindness and mercy to others

*those that pursue purity and uprightness in all areas of life

*those who promote total well being both personally and communally

*those who have been wrongfully treated because of their faith

After hearing this talk, I would might think:

"that hobo dude is looney! and these 12 hippies are ridiculous!"

I would hope that my response would have been:

Oh how wonderful to be face to face with Jesus!

I am so in love with every word coming out of his mouth, every move he made, every moment his gaze passed me....

I could sit for hours and hours...maybe even days and days...and might not feel the hunger, hear the noisy kids, smell the offensive odors, see the camels spitting, or be concerned with germs and creepy crawlies!!

Based on my current distracted quiet times

my selfish and lazy habits

and my usual opinions of  "bible talkin" people...

I am afraid that Jesus could have walked right by me, go through torture and suffering, be nailed to a tree...and I might have ignored it all....

This year, ignore the worldly noise, smells, and views.

Fall in love with listening and talking to God!

My life is perfect...

My life is perfect and I have pictures to prove it!!

Here is a secret to get your own perfect life....

I want you to see my perfect kids that I have loved, trained, disciplined, taught.....

with blood, sweat, and tears....

Perfect picture of the boys

before the arms moved to strangle each other and the legs started tripping each other

and words were seeping from behind gritted teeth...

This year...be quick with a camera so you can snap a moment of perfect lies!