look before you growl

The evenings are the hardest with Jeff being gone! Jack and I were commenting on how it did not seem very "Christmassy" even with our tree up, Christmas specials on, working a Christmas puzzle, etc....

Next thing I know.....Jack is throwing something at my tree, running to grab it, stepping back and throwing it again...

Then Max joins in....

HAVE MY BOYS LOST THEIR MINDS??? There isn't any craziness like that in my house...especially after 5pm!!!

Then they show me what they have made! It was Jack's idea....
Christmas Tree Huggers:

Within minutes they had each created "people" out of pipe cleaners and were tossing them at the Christmas tree.

Sometimes they would stand really close and other times they would stand on the other side of the room. The "hugger" that landed the highest on the tree got the most points. If you threw your "hugger" and it grabbed the opponents "hugger" off the tree, then that was REALLY GREAT and more commotion!!

oh, you have to look hard but on the left...Max's landed high up near the top!

(you can also see my big burger ornament...from the bottom of it...I love burgers!)

(2 years ago we made snow flakes...I got carried away and made a ton and then strung them up)

(look in the middle at the bottom and see the disco mirror ball? I have about 12 on the tree...they are AWESOME when the sunlight hits them!!......YES! my tree matches my personality!)

Back to the game:

Normally, I don't like this kind of commotion right beside me at 9:30pm BUT I thought this was a genius game!!!

I made my own "hugger" in the shape of a Christmas tree....

by bedtime, throwing stances had been perfected.....this is Jack....

both "huggers" landed at the top of the tree and the boys looked like bugs trying to hurry and climb on each other or something to get it down without touching the tree...because they knew I would "touch" them if they broke anything!

(see my burger ornament? LOVE IT!!)

(If you are wondering, the big white thing on top of the tree is an "Indian head" made out of paper. I never had a tree topper, so about 5 years ago, Max made me the Indian head and Jack made me a star exploding. It was a paper towel roll painted red and cut at the end like an exploding star.....it fell off in the game...it may be in another picture.)

Back to the game:

My "hugger" hardly ever made it on the tree. Turns out the longer bodied "huggers" hugged the tree better! Mine was either flung the wrong way or hit the tree and fell off. If it stuck to the tree, the boys usually got higher!!!

Also, I never got off the couch. I had my snuggie on, I was holding the remote, my drink, popcorn.....

But I get points for playing RIGHT???

p.s. this idea is patented/copyrighted for Jack and if you steal it for profit.........you will find out about my anger issues!!!!

Don't pull that!

Well the big day arrived!! The day after Thanksgiving, Jeff's family came to have lunch at my house!! As you know from my previous post, I was nervous as to which mistakes I would make in this cooking adventure.

I only had two that I know about for sure.....and they weren't a real biggy:

1. I needed the rolls to rise on Thanksgiving day and my house was too cold so I had to turn our heat up. It was in the 70s outside so the 4 of us felt like we were going to die of a heat stroke....BUT

THEY ROSE....

and they tasted great!!

2. I cooked an empty pan and burned the cooking spray that was on said pan...... that was ready for the cheese biscuits for my mom's feast.......but I figured it out and all was fine!!

The other item I prepared on Thursday for my big meal on Friday was my first ever home made fresh cranberry sauce! This was fun! It ended up being tart (was supposed to be) but it was still good! 

Actually, everything I made was great!! Now, depending on which person you ask.......you may get a different answer because of different taste preferences.....but I tasted everything.....AND I thought everything tasted great.....AND I am my harshest critic!!! AND.....everything turned out pretty much like it was supposed to turn out....AND that is a THANKSGIVING MIRACLE!!!! in my cooking world...

BUT WAIT!!!! THE TURKEY!!!

I was so nervous about the turkey. I am not a meat eater. It really grosses me out to see meat before it is cooked. I don't care for Turkey. I have made it known that I would rather have a burger and fries for Thanksgiving...but everyone else prefers the traditional meal.

Thursday night after eating dinner at my mom's, I put my plan into action. It was 10:30pm. The first step was to take the "turkey breast with bone-in" out of the refrigerator and rinse it then dry it......GROSS.

I cut open the packaging and a river of blood poured into my sink. I held back a gag and then a goat bleat actually came out of my mouth involuntarily. Max ran out of the kitchen. I had called him in to watch because he was interested.....but he yelled as he ran away that he would just look at it once it was cooked. I turned the water on and started to rinse the turkey breast. I started with the nasty cavity.

Then I flipped the turkey over and saw this flap. I thought it was like a skin flap and maybe it should be cut off. I started to pull it.....then it looked like it was tucked into a butthole.....I started to gag uncontrollably. I yelled for Jeff. He came in as I pulled the skin flap as tight as I could....

I threw up a little in my mouth!!......

The nightmare continued until I got the turkey oiled down, butter up under the skin and completely seasoned......then I had to crack the bones when putting it in the crockpot...........I nearly fainted....and then it still would not fit!! Jeff had to do it!!

The turkey ended up being the best tasting turkey!!! Max loved it and he is my pickiest eater!!! It was not spongey! It fell off the bone, it wasn't dry or bland, it was full of flavor.....it was perfect!!! I will brag, brag, brag!!!! 

Friday morning cooking went well, too! No problems. Everything was done on time and all my recipes worked!! 

I had fun and am very pleased! I hope to do it again next year!!!............maybe not bathing the turkey with the neck sleeve.......

Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

Tomorrow starts the Most Wonderful Time Of The Year for me!!

From November 24th to December 24th, I am filled with great JOY!!! It hasn't always been that way. When I was in school, I had to worry about school work. When I worked an actual JOB, I had to worry with going to the JOB....
But now that I stay home with the kids and we do school in the home, I can actually enjoy the entire season!!

I just have a few tiny complaints like:
* the radio Christmas songs....there are many rock groups that have redone Christmas songs, yet the radio station that does the holiday music 24/7 plays the same songs over and over and they are the BAD country or the BAD r&b (and I am not knocking r&b) or they play the horrible songs with the dying mother who for some reason needs new shoes.....

The one that makes me cry is actually a great song by the fabulous B.B. King. There is one line that says "it takes 6 months to pay the whole thing off"...He is talking about buying everyone what they want for Christmas and doing Christmas up the right way but then it takes the next 6 months to pay it all off.....
I cry because I think he wrote this when he was poor and he could still pay off his credit card in 6 months.....I think it took me 5 years! I should have played the guitar instead of teaching!!

WARNING: I may lose most of my readers on the next 2 complaints....just keep in mind that you either don't know me and read for some weird reason..so keep reading!! OR you love me and should love me unconditionally...OR you KNOW me so never take me too seriously!!

*December 25th....is a depressing day...the presents are over in minutes and for a female adult that means cleaning and cooking is left for the rest of the day....and for me that AIN'T fun!! I do like watching my children play but truthfully I don't get anything and I don't get to play so I clean up the paper, start laundry if needed and cook breakfast or whatever for the lunch that day.....

*December 25th on a Sunday......yea, I heard you gasp...but I don't like going to church on Christmas day....it puts a kink in things! For one, my kids are usually sick anyway....And any of you that can say your kids happily go to church and leave their toys...."good for you"....

Now, I don't need a sermon......and I don't want to hear about how creative you are in bringing the REAL meaning of Christmas....I realized I was slipping in that department the year I found Max with the nativity scene spread out under the tree, hot wheels mixed in and the shepherds carrying machine guns.

* one more downer for me is when the Memphis weather ruins it all by staying in the high 50s or warmer.....it must be in the low 50s or cooler...

Good thing I am not high maintenance!!! AM I RIGHT????

 old pic of the boys decorating my mom's tree at her old house one year when I was teaching in the school system!!

I try so hard to be a better person!!!!!

I am so glad I only have 2 kids and one husband!! I do laundry ALL day EVERY day....and my washer and dryer are becoming VERY rebellious. I guess in appliance years, they are in their teens.

I admit, when I walk into their room....I give the first dirty look. I probably mutter the first dirty word or sarcastic remark.... or I might be a little over aggressive with Washer when it is "stomping" around while pretending to be in "spin cycle".....BUT I am the OWNER! I am not always talking about the fact that Washer does not spin appropriately or Dryer does not dry the first time told! Most of the time I am speaking about the Piles and how they multiply or divide.

I should not mind the extra modifications to get them to do their work. I certainly don't want to spend a fortune on the "pretty" models that pretend to know what they're doing and then every time I walk into the room I might have to listen to........"I am gorgeous...look at me.....I know EXACTLY how to wash this towel.....ooh la la! look at how I dry this sweater....."......or worse it shushes me because it is supposed to be quiet when it is washing and drying!!

I will try to be a better laundress........sigh.....

Holiday Game For All To Play

Here is a holiday game in which all my readers can participate!

This year, I am hosting Thanksgiving at my house for Jeff's family.
There will be a guaranteed Classic Maz story out of this situation because I am cooking the whole feast and.......................................I can't cook!

my angry cooking face

Here is what happens when I cook:
*I accidentally leave important ingredients out of the recipe.

*I don't have an important ingredient so I substitute and it does not work.

*Something gets left in the food that should not be there (example: paper in between the cheese slices) and it gets cooked into the meal.

*I follow the directions exactly and the food burns anyway, or is liquid when it should be solid, or is doughy in the middle and burned on the outside, or runs off the pan like a lake when it should puff up, or it explodes after 5 minutes and it should cook for 45 minutes.........etc...

*I truly can burn a pan of water (it dries up and scorches).

*I own 3 pots, 2 crockpots, several pans and a large mysterious oven from the early 80s.......


So, I have planned a delicious Thanksgiving Menu for 11 people.  I am thrilled and excited!! I think this will be one of my favorite Thanksgivings EVER!!!

Let's see which one of you can guess what might happen! I don't plan on anything happening!! Then again.....I never do!!!

Here is the menu:
Turkey Breast seasoned and cooked in the crockpot
Crockpot dressing
Homemade Cranberry sauce
Homemade Mashed potatoes
gravy
rolls
southern baked macaroni and cheese
7 layer salad
unsweet ice tea
Ice Water (pretty sure I can handle this one.....)

***My mother-in-law will bring the dessert (I am not totally stupid! They are a huge dessert family!! I won't risk messing up the dessert!)

p.s.
This is actually the day after Thanksgiving....I am making 2 things to take to my mom's for Thanksgiving Day!!

emotional day

Today was a day to mark the passing of time.

FIRST

Jeff was the manager of Colco Fine Woods for 3 years. It was his favorite job EVER!! It was his dream job. He loved working with the wood and the woodworkers. Unfortunately, it only paid hourly and did not provide any benefits. After Jeff got his current job, he dreamed of buying Colco! We even looked into it seriously....but could never find a way to make it happen.
Bill, the owner, passed away this summer. Colco is going out of business. EVERYTHING must go!! Bill's son held back a special item for Jeff until Jeff could get back in town. We went to pick it up today. I don't know about Jeff, but being in the store, around his co-workers, around Bill's son and picking up the special item.....made me choke back some tears. Colco was Jeff's favorite job!! It was the best place to work!!

At times, Mr. Bill would sit at the front of the store in this chair. He would wait for customers to greet them as soon as they came in the door. He was in his late 80s.

Jeff said he only wanted the chair if I would let him keep it in the house. I was happy to have it in the living room. It is actually in good shape and very comfortable. I love the history that comes with it!!

SECOND

Back in August, Jeff was driving home in our oldest car and it died. It has been sitting in our second driveway (yes we have 2....long story). We have been using one car which is not a problem since he is gone all the time. The other day, a couple stopped and asked if I wanted to sell that car. I said it did not work. He asked me some questions...I called Jeff.....long story short....

We sold the car today. This car is the car we bought when Jack was born. We needed a car that had seat belts that would WORK and would hold a car seat for a newborn. I remember buying the car brand new off the Saturn lot. I had never had a brand new car...only used. We hardly had any money. We bought the lowest line...no power ANYTHING....We even had the guy take the console out of the middle because that would have been an extra $100. I bet those salespeople talked about us for the longest!! I took a picture of our newborn 8lb baby in the backseat just like the day we bought it....well sort of....

Now I have to mow the driveway where that car had been sitting.......

Clueless

Tonight I dropped off Jack at youth group. Max and I were skipping church since he is sick. I felt bad about missing my class because there is always low attendance and I really like my teacher.

Max and I stopped by the bookstore on the way home to get his next book in the series he is reading. The parking lot was packed. I could not figure out why in the world the book store would be so busy on a Wednesday night but it is a "trendy" bookstore....so I did not think about it too long!!

We went into the store. There was a huge crowd in the middle of the store and I saw people taking pictures. I had no idea who was speaking. I figured it was a book signing but I also figured that I would probably not care WHO the person was.

Max headed to his book area. I headed to mine. I was looking for the latest behavior/education book (I have quite a collection). I heard the speaker on the microphone, but still could not see her. She was speaking on education. I was not paying too much attention because I was reading book jackets and forwards in the books I was interested.

The more I heard her speak....the more I thought "wow! she is smart! I like this lady! She sounds intelligent and like she really knows something about education! I wonder what book she wrote. I wonder if I know her!"
BUT....I hate crowds...and I did not care enough to go look and see who she was.

Max found his books. I chose a book and we went to the checkout. I looked at the door and saw my Wednesday night bible study teacher exiting with a signed book (I wasn't the only one skipping tonight!!). Then I saw several other people from church....and then I saw the picture of the author on the book!!!

I purchased my book and grabbed Max and ran over to the crowd. I made Max stand on the magazine display so he and I could look at the famous author and so I could say....

I SAW CONDOLEEZZA RICE!!! I was 20 feet from her!! I heard her speak (unknowingly!!)
I did not get her book because you had to pre-order to get it signed....if I am not getting it signed, I will wait for paperback!!!

(......and my camera was in the car......dern!)