OH YEAH!!!

In response to yesterday's post.....

The comment from Jack's Uncle Will
"I knew I had seen that pose before"

Uncle Will totally saw the look we saw in this pic!!

Most Wanted

jealous?

I would rather see Freddy Krueger!

After last night's dream...he looks so comforting!!

I have blogged before about my dreams.....Hulk Hands, crumbling teeth, roller skate feet, etc...

I love that I have crazy dreams...induced by stress...or migraine meds...and I love that they are so vivid and memorable...

BUT last night was a new one!!

I woke up exhausted...not unusual..

I woke up with a sore jaw...not unusual...means I clenched my jaw, or was grinding my teeth, etc...

But the dream...what a crazy crazy CRAZY and long dream!!

First....in real life...I am not particularly an animal person and I work on behaviors with PEOPLE....

Last night I dreamed that I had to get a job and the only job that I could find was....was....

wait for it....

herding cats....

AND once I rounded up the cats....

I had to "FIX" their behavior problems!!

In this "cat school", there was one cat that was a menace and I was the only one in the city that could "handle" this cat and its WILD ways.

This horrendous menace to the city walked with all fours spread out (what?? made no sense).....would not walk "normal".  I used behavior modification to teach it to walk like a normal cat and all was right with the city.....

My name is MAZ and I have a problem.....I don't know what it is....but it is DEFINITELY a problem!!

Ugggh! This is the LONGEST DAY EVER....

Well, scientifically it IS....the longest.... for the year!

June 21st is the summer solstice....and some people PARTY! Go ahead...click on that word...scroll through those pics....glad I am not at that "party"....

Has summer changed? Or is it just me?

When I was little, I felt like summer lasted forever!! now it is only a couple of months (out of school)..

When I was little, I got up.. ate, and then played all day...
I hear parents talk and they have their kids in camps all day and all summer...

When I was little, I drank out of the hose if I got thirsty, I rode my bike, I made my own PB&J and ate it outside.....not because my mom wouldn't...but because I was busy playing!!
I have to lock my kids out of the house and give them chores or reading to do if I find them in the house!!
I know kids that never go outside because they don't like the heat.....WHAT???

I filled garbage cans up with water and stood in them, I made holes all over my yard with a pogo stick (as a game), I slid on garbage bags with water and soap (slip-n-slide), I made trails in the woods for my BMX dirt bike (non-motorized).....by the way...I lived in Chattanooga, not Memphis!! I climbed trees, I hollowed out play areas in briar bushes, I jumped on a mini trampoline and sang songs at the top of my lungs in my room (sorry family), I made cities out of boxes for my hot wheels, my parent's shower (with sliding door) was an elevator (sorry dad..probably why it was off track a lot!), my best friend and I spent an entire afternoon balanced on the edge of her chain-linked fence pretending we were surrounded by sharks AND we had her plastic horse with us that was broken off (used to be a jumpy/bouncy horse), we also cut a hole in a cardboard box...made it a TV....and we got in it MAKING TV shows, commercials, etc.....(most of these things I was 10yr-14yr! could be why Jeff was my only boyfriend!)

BRING BACK SUMMER!!!!
Get your kids off TV, games, and whatever else they sit behind!!! Teach them to play! (you may have to retrain yourself!)
Get them sticks, rocks, cardboard, ropes, trees, dirt, bugs, water......lock the doors...turn off technology

Use the rest of this summer to grow BRILLIANT and HAPPIER kids!!

By the way, as I am typing this....my oldest is on a youth trip and my youngest is sick and sleeping on the couch......but it IS a good idea!! At least I think so...

SWEET ESCAPE......I feel like new!

I have needed a couple of days to "get away from it all"....

I got just what I needed this past Thursday and Friday!! AHHHH.....my sweet escape!!!

I know most women would like...

a day at the spa...manicure, pedicure...

NOT ME...actually, I have never been to those/had those...and don't plan to (sounds yucky)..

My idea of a stress release???

Two day training for CERT volunteer!! I missed my calling....to be a paramedic, or with an emergency response of some sort....but the past two days were a taste of some pretty cool stuff...

AND I got to do it with my dad....and that's...pretty cool !!!

First, we were told to put on the mandatory CERT leader items

Boots (we didn't have them), Hat, Goggles, Gloves, Mask.....and we got a vest...

Then, we were told we were going to put out an oil fire!! I was so excited...I immediately texted Jeff!!

I soon realized that we were not using the fire hose....but fire extinguishers....AND we were not driving the fire trucks.....AND this above building was not going to be set on fire....you have to click on the above picture to see the small contained oil fire that we were putting out with an extinguisher....while walking arm in arm with a fully suited fireman.....BUT IT WAS STILL REALLY COOL!!!

We learned a TON of information the first day.... because of course.... I will be able to take over the world in case of a disaster....I am certified to do so....

One interesting fact that was brought to my attention....and I feel the need to remind everyone...in case of an emergency...

You can drink the water that is in the back of your toilet tank!! So scoop it in a nice pitcher, use some party cups...and enjoy!!

By the end of the first day...a few of us were DEAD tired!!

Day two was Search And Rescue...and I was in charge of medical...talking to the victim...

I found out that her name was Sue Ellen, she was worried about her children, she could not feel her legs, she had trouble breathing, and she was not happy...

My team used the leverage/cribbing technique to free her from debris....we started to pull her from the rubble and realized that her forehead was marked DEAD.....she indeed did not have a pulse....she was like a dummy....

I mentioned to my teammates that I must be the ghost whisperer because I had been talking to her (or her spirit) the entire time.....and she was dead.....(it IS one of my favorite shows and I HAVE been watching the seasons on netflix).....again, I was thrilled!!!

After learning how to make bombs, survive explosions, etc.....we received our REAL and professional government badges, were told where to order our special CERT bags filled with the CERT hard hats, etc and were given certificates of completion.....I felt sure that I would also receive one of these...

I did not...

I have not been able to order my official CERT leader gear.....but I am ready for any neighborhood disaster....and will carry my professional badge at all times....even to church!!

Hat, Gloves, Mask, Goggles, Boots, (vest)

BADGE

I smell that! and I know who did it!!

....sigh....I hope I don't lose readers on this one....but as I was lying in my living room floor for 3 hours this afternoon....completely exhausted....another metaphor hit me (you know I love metaphors)

A church family is like a real family! Sometimes they can really make you mad. You may feel like you want to leave and go to another "family/church".....they aren't doing it the right way....find another church that is doing it the right way....

Every church farts....I have learned my church farts and who did what smell....and what it means!

".....GROSS! I need to stay out of that area!"

"......whew....come back in a few minutes..."

".....oh goodness...hold your breath and it will be over soon."



Everyone has their highs and lows....

This week has been one of my lowest....spiritually and physically....

AND lucky for me (I say sarcastically)....it was also VBS week at my church! I was part of the skit team and needed to be silly, goofy, happy, and upbeat for at least 3 hours every day.  I know I failed miserably, but thankfully...my costumes and "dry humor" possibly(??) covered for me.....

I have failed you...my readers...in that I do not have ANY pictures of me:
bike helmet
life vest
rain pants, pulled up to my armpits
swim float around my waist
garden boots with argil socks

None of this matters in today's post...

Every morning, I had my closest friends, my acquaintances, new friends, strangers, and YES irritants....to hold me to my commitment and to bring out the happiness and joy....if it had not been for them, I would have been at home all week....wallowing in pity, stress and pure MAZness!

So, thank you Second Presbyterian Church family for your love, friendship.....and farts!

Life can be a London Fog

For some reason I have strange memories that stick with me from my childhood and one is my mother's raincoat....I remember when I was young my mom had a nice trench coat made by London Fog. She loved it!!

When I was about 5 years old, I was at the mall with my mom. We had paused at one of the store fronts to look at something. After a few moments, I turned and saw my mom's dark, short hair and her prized London Fog coat walking down the mall.....How could she just walk off and leave me? She did not even say "come on, let's go"...or take my hand...nothing!! I ran to her and grabbed her hand. I looked up into her face...

It wasn't my mom. A strange lady smiled down at me....

At the same time...one step behind me...my mom's voice calmly and reassuringly called "Margaret"...

I turned and ran to her. I hugged her as if I had been gone from her for hours...even though it was only a few seconds.....

My mom had not left me.....I had confused myself by taking my eyes off my mom. I had not looked at the face. I had not looked at what I KNEW to be her, the characteristics, the TRUTH.....I "glanced" at the "wrapping" and assumed it to be the truth.....


I have had to watch myself at church recently and not make the same mistake with my husband (or pastor)....

We had a pastor on staff that resembled my husband....bald, same facial hair, similar height, etc....

On several occasions I had stopped myself from slapping this man on the back of the head or embracing him from behind, etc.....because at the last second THANK GOODNESS...I thought to myself...

"this guy has on a suit....Jeff doesn't wear a suit"

I would have embarrassed myself MANY times by slapping or hugging or maybe lovingly caressing this pastor if I had not looked for THE TRUTH and just "glanced" at what I "wanted" to see.....

Because I decided to give my life back to Jesus, there are some trials in life that don't "go" with the world's outlook or standards. I often "glance" at the situation and feel confused or misled.

James chapter one (a book in the Bible) reminded me that God does not tempt us. His word has given me all the TRUTH that I need. I can look at the trial in the face and He is one step behind me......calmly and reassuringly calling my name...."Margaret"