Paula Dean is worried about my sons

Remember the research paper my boys were doing??? Well, the paper and a couple of other things take about 3 weeks....stick 2 weeks of spring break in the middle.....I need to check out the books again.

I took the big stack of books to the library....carried it up to the lady....

supposed to be quiet in the library right???

I quietly hoist my stack on the counter...

me: "excuse me" I look to the right of the stack....the lady looks to the left...

me: "excuse me" I look to the left of the stack....the lady looks to the right...

me: (not sure where to look) "excuse me....(right, left) can i check these out again?"

I hear a loud cackle and I look around for Paula Dean....then I look up and see the librarian peering over the stack of books......she loudly says..

"HA HA....YOU'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE HAVE YOU?"

i shake my head no...

"LORD, HONEY....YOU DON'T HAVE TO BRING THE BOOKS IF YOU ARE GOING TO CHECK THEM OUT AGAIN...HA HA HA....I ALWAYS KNOW THE PEOPLE THAT DON'T COME TO THE LIBRARY....THEY BRING ALL THE BOOKS IN JUST TO CHECK THEM OUT AGAIN.....YOU ARE GOING TO BREAK YOUR BACK.....LET ME SEE YOUR LIBRARY CARD...."

she scans the card.....

"THIS IS THE LAST TIME YOU CAN CHECK THESE OUT!! SURELY YOUR KIDS ARE ALMOST DONE WITH THEIR SCHOOL PROJECT!! YOU CAN KEEP THESE BOOKS UNTIL APRIL 14TH........THEIR TEACHER WILL PROBABLY WANT THEIR PROJECT BEFORE THEN....."

then she peered over the stack and over her glasses.......not kidding...

"DO YOU   K...N...O....W    WHEN THEIR PROJECT IS DUE?"

i was amused by this

me: (refusing to speak loud in a library) "my son's teacher is very difficult but he is top in his class and actually top in his school. he is the only one in his whole grade expected to do this report. i am positive he will get it done on time."

She looked at me with awe. "What school?"

me: "It is a private school. Ziegenhorn School for the gifted. It is college prep."

lady: "oh! yes! "

She handed me back the books and wished me a "Lovely Day"

Memphians.....watch out for Paula Dean at the Main Library....she is very friendly, loud and worried about your students!!!........and now me......