Monday, December 5, 2011

Classic MAZ vs. Elf on the Shelf

I had never heard of Elf On The Shelf until about 2 years ago. 
My friends were talking about this ELF that does something every night from December 1st until Christmas. Some people even talked about their ELF leaving gifts for the children.

Well, I immediately was relieved that we didn't know about this "Christmas Tradition".
We definitely did not need another gift giving tradition or another "something" that does something for the kids to find when they wake up!!

The boys were "old" enough that I did not need to worry if I should start this tradition to keep up with other families.....NOT GONNA DO IT...

BUT....

A couple of days ago, a friend of mine was telling about her kid being slightly disturbed about an ELF moving around the house at night.

"BING"   "BING"   "BING"  "BING"

A creepy ELF!!??!!

Now THAT is a Christmas tradition that I could enjoy!!!

When I got home I went straight to my elf sitting in my tree. He has been in my tree or packed in the attic my entire life! I think he is about 40 years old....or more!

I stared at him and said aloud "you look like those other elves...I wonder why you were never a tradition in my house...."

"HA HA....I HAVE BEEN A PART OF YOUR CHRISTMAS YOUR WHOLE LIFE"

I was shocked!
"listen here ELF..."
"My name is Elwood....ruler of all the elves."

He told me exactly how he had been a part of my Christmas traditions....

"I am the reason Max is out of candy before Jack is. I eat some of Max's stash at night."




"I get help when I need to hide the remote at night so I can silently laugh at you trying to find it the next day!"





"I was so happy this season when I realized you had bought new socks for Max. I was running out of socks to steal!"




"My favorite days are when you are nagging the boys to rinse the toothpaste out of the sink that I squirted in there the night before."




"When I am tired and can't be that creative, I can always be sure you will fuss at the boys for leaving the cereal box open!"



"It can be dangerous, but if you guys go to bed early enough....I can open a couple of cabinet doors!"





"Last year was great! You were trying to drink one glass of sweet tea per day. You really enjoyed sipping on that one glass...ha ha....I would sneak and drink half of it to leave you wondering how you drank your tea so fast without realizing!"


I could not believe it! I had the ruler of all the Elves on the Shelves!!

I told Elwood that he was welcome to do whatever he wanted to Jack and Max....
the creepier the better!

I had one rule:
Don't mess with me!

He agreed. Over the next few days, I enjoyed his work!
Jack found him in his bed....with a prize

One night, Jack found him playing poker....

he must have moved the party to the pantry...Max found him the next morning!

I found him stealing Jack's pop gun that Jack won at his Christmas party.



I had to get on to Elwood for messing up our advent boxes...I worked hard on those tiny surprises!



I found Elwood making a list last night.

I was thrilled to have a creepy elf in my home. This was going to be so much fun!!


BUT THEN.....
ELWOOD!!!
my hair doesn't need anymore help looking crazy!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS.......watch out for Elwood's friends!



3 comments:

  1. You are insane!
    Les

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  2. Great stuff happens at your house. I hope I live long enopugh to hear your boys tell their kids all of the stuff that happened to them as they were growing up. Your and Jeff are great parents.
    Aunt Delores

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  3. 1. I just saw this. It is hysterical! snickering out loud w/ NZ

    2. That is the VERY CREEPIEST elf EVER! Looks like the Mama Cloar/Mama Jean generation of Christmas decor.... (not that there's anything wrong w/ that)

    3. Thank you for the giggles -- my day needed that. :) Julie Z.

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